http://www.bagu.cc/
(Background)
At work, I am constantly moving. I am walking around our buildings and coming in contact with many people. In order to make my job a little easier, I usually try to squeeze a "hello" or a friendly nod in passing. I see some people fairly often, but it’s never more than 10-15 seconds. Not much time for any real conversation.
The average chat goes like this:
Me: Hey, how’s it going?
Them: Good. How are you doin?
Me: Pretty good.
…and I walk off.
It got to the point where I was giving the same response, regardless of what the other person said first. It started screwing with my head.
Me: Hey, how’s it going?
Them: Pretty good. Did you catch the Indians game last night?
Me: Pretty good.
…
Me: OH! I did! I’m pretty good! No..the team was did.
<akward silence>
<walks away, embarassed>
I did this quite a few times, leading my coworkers to think that I was borderline retarded.
Eventually, I talked to my dad (who comes in contact with a lot of people every day) what he does to keep short conversations flowing. He gave me a few expressions and catchy cliches.
(End Background)
Now, when I say anything that sounds remotely funny…people laugh. Whether it’s a deep belly laugh or a simple chuckle, they laugh. Whether it’s genuine or just them being courteous, they will laugh. People will do anything to avoid that awkward pause/silence.
I take advantage of this knowledge (that they WILL laugh) on a daily basis.
Me: Good morning.
Them: Hey, how’s it going?
Me: Oh, you know, just a few hairs short of a wig, but don’t tell the taxman!
Them: Yeah, tell me about it! Hahahaha.
Me: Alright, later.
I have come up with a few phrases to insert in that crucial part of the conversation:
Them: Hey, how’s it going?
Me:
1) Well, if this weather keeps up, we’ll all be like me! Haha!
2) Pretty good. I’ve had my daily recommended allowance of caffeine, so clear the runway!
3) Eh, so-so. Another day, another dollar, another cup of coffee, another chance to stick it to the man!
4) Once I get some coffee, I’ll be twice as good as I was yesterday!
5) You know what they say, "We all wake up to do something."
6) You know what they say, "You can’t dance forever!"
7) You know what they say, "The fancy cat gets the glasses."
8) You know what they say, "Four more trips and I’ll be the boss!"
9) You know what they say, "Coffee is fantastic, but work is not."
10) You know what they say, "For every cup of coffee you drink, a printer gets a paper jam."
If you’re saying these things to a coworker that you doesn’t really know you that well, I guarantee that they will smile or laugh.